High School Lessons #4

Lesson #4: Teaching makes you impervious to insults

There are many things about teenagers that, although fairly obvious, jump out at you after spending much of your day with them. The main thing that I've noticed this year is that these kids are completely mercurial. Hot one minute, cold the next, my students never fail to surprise me with their reactions to in-class situations or the logic behind their actions and behaviors.

For example, my students strongly believe that, if they are upset about something in my classroom (be it the way I am running things, an assignment, or a test), it will upset me, as well.

Imagine, if you will, the following being said in a whiny voice:

"This test is stupid!"

"I've never seen a test more pointless than this one!"

"You are such a hater!"

"I like [insert other teacher's name here] so much better than you!"

"This is the most boring class I've ever been in!"

Yeah, yeah ... Keep the insults coming ...

The test probably is stupid and pointless (When, after Ohio Graduation Tests are over, are any of these kids going to need to know the three types of rocks?). I most certainly do hate your bad behavior. That other teacher can "borrow" you from my classroom anytime! Classes where no one participates are boring for me, too ...

It's just so amusing that they don't realize the ineffectiveness of their approach. Maybe, last year as a new teacher, I would have spent a moment or two thinking about their complaints. I might have stressed over whether or not I, or my class, was well liked. That's not to say that I don't care about these things now, I just see how fleeting these teenage feelings are ... A student that is "mad at me" one afternoon, will be smiling and waving to me the next morning.

Besides, I'm not looking to be liked ... I'm looking to be respected.

High School Lessons #3

Lesson #3: Parent/Teacher Conferences can be a good thing

They say that nothing is truly free in this world.

They aren't lying.

I have a "Teacher Free Day" today, so that means no school ... But you better believe that I have earned every single penny (and more) of this paid day off! While I'm only actually in front of the classroom "teaching" students for just under 3.5 hours a day, and my experiences this year have not been nearly as traumatic as those from last year, my job is far from easy.

Being a teacher requires you to be so many things at once: expert, entertainer, motivator, disciplinarian, inspiration, friend ... Although I'm not yet at that stage of my life, I'd have to compare it to being a "temporary parent."

Just when you think you know what you're doing, you realize that you know nothing at all.

Just when you think you've seen everything, something comes as quite a surprise.

Anyway, this "Teacher Free Day" is a reward for making it through two consecutive nights of (oft dreaded) Parent/Teacher Conferences. Despite the blatant lack of parents in attendance (I probably saw just under half of the parents I should have), I think that things went well, and I actually enjoyed myself during each of the 3.5 hour sessions. Of the parents that did show, many were enthusiastic and perfectly pleasant individuals, just the type of parents a teacher hopes for ... And they gave me so much insight as to why their kids act certain ways and just what to do about it in the classroom.

For example, some parents took the "tough love" approach and gave me permission to knock their sons and daughters "upside the head." Others offered their unyielding support and put into words what I've been feeling for months: "You're not there to entertain [the kids], you're there to teach them." One father actually teared up as he described how proud he was of his daughter for achieving straight A's this quarter (and he should be proud, because his daughter is awesome ... I don't know what I'd do without her!).

In every "conference," I gained something useful for the coming months. I gained validation that I'm doing the best that I can on any give day.

I gained perspective.

I wouldn't say that these conferences make me wish that I was back in the classroom instead of enjoying my lovely stress-free Free Day at home ... But I will admit that all of the hand shakes and "thank yous" provide a shock of bright sunshine in a profession that can so easily be dark and stormy. Uphill battle or not, communication (and support!) from parents can really make the difference and give you the energy to keep on going.

Free Days don't hurt either. :)

High School Lessons (#2)

If any other high school science teachers out there stumble upon this blog, this post is for you.

(You can thank me later ...)

Lesson #2: Tenth graders LOVE Bill Nye the Science Guy

Being that today is Friday, and we were basically wrapping up our latest chapter in preparation for a test next week anyway, I found a Bill Nye video at the library and decided to use it in class today. Not only would it take up 26 minutes out of my 50 minute period, it would change things up a bit ... My students have been doing a lot of "independent study" lately, which is basically just them reading at their seats and filling in answers on a worksheet.

I have only used a Bill Nye video once at my previous school and, for some unfathomable reason, the age group it targeted (middle school kids) seemed to think it was "dumb" and "stupid." Let's just say that is most definitely not the case with high-schoolers ...

From the second I announced that we'd be watching a video, I was bombarded with: "Is it Bill Nye the Science Guy?!"

This surprised me a little bit (I know that I've always liked Bill Nye but I had no idea he had a teen aged following), but the response to my answer of "yes" was even more unexpected. The cheer that erupted from the room was so loud, you would have thought that I had just given the entire class the next week off! And then, when the video started, all was quiet ... That is, until the theme song started up. There was bopping in the seats, shouts of "Bill! Bill!" in time with the music, and genuine giddiness and laughter as the video progressed. It's almost hard to imagine a student in this age group laughing at something that isn't filled with sexual innuendo, but they were.

They were loving it.

The act of watching this particular video sort of stripped away some of their "I'm-too-cool-for-everything" layers and they began acting like the kids they truly are underneath all those walls and reputations ... It was nice to look around the room and see them entranced by the video, heads propped up on elbows, eyes focused on the TV. It was nice to see kids filling my classroom, not mini-adults as they often pretend to be.

But, ultimately, it was nice to have a little reminder (after a long week) as to why I really do like working with this often volatile, always unpredictable age group.

High School Lessons (#1)

I've been back at school for a full month, and I've been meaning to post a new "lesson" for some time now. Unfortunately, inspiration (and a moment to myself and my thoughts) has been in short supply.

In thinking of something to get this particular type of post started again, one exchange between myself and an Earth Science student stuck out in my mind.

Lesson #1: The more things change, the more they stay the same

While helping students with group work one day, a student (out of the blue) looked at me and said: "You think we're crazy, don't you?"

Puzzled, I walked over to her. "Why would you say that?" I asked.

"You just have this look on your face sometimes," she replied with a shrug.

This got me to thinking. First of all, it's not a good thing that my face has already given my thoughts away, and second, I find my students and their odd behaviors to be amusing rather than crazy ... Most of the time, anyway.

I guess it's just that these kids (all too often) remind me of me and my high school experience. Even though it's just over ten years from the time that I was in their position, things are almost exactly the same as I remember them. While the high school isn't composed of all-girls (as I was used to), the similarities are staggering.

I see the same cliques ... The smart kids, the slackers, the sports stars, the drama geeks , the musicians, the popular crowd ... There are the same complaints about uniforms, the distance between classes and lockers, the food being served for lunch, the length of the school day, and the amount of homework that is being assigned. There are the same clubs and activities, and there is a buzz of excitement at the mention of school dances. I've even noticed that there are the same types of teachers ... The strict ones, the goofy ones, the understanding ones, the scary ones, and even the ones that don't seem to "get it."

Yes, many of the dynamics that I remember are alive and well, only I'm looking at them from the opposite direction. On one hand, I feel extremely tired and just plain old being around these teenagers. On the other, the end of the day causes my own high school memories to come flooding back ...

And, if I turned out to be a well-adjusted, productive adult, there is hope for each one of my students!

Middle School Lessons (#5)

Since I can't think of anything else in my own life worth posting about, I've decided to take a look at my notes from last school year and come up with another lesson ... Not only does this give me something to tide over my handful (Is that an exaggeration?) of readers, it reminds me just why I'm still searching for that new teaching position and not giving up.

Lesson #5: Appearance is everything

It’s really very interesting how one child’s demeanor and/or behavior can be one way in class and a completely different way after class.

For instance, one of my 7th graders was a tough, street-smart girl named Francesca. In class she was loud, rude, disrespectful, and lazy … But, at the end of the day she was probably the sweetest, funniest girl you could ever want to meet. It’s a good thing she liked me (or, maybe, at the very least tolerated me) because she could totally snap me in half like a twig if she wanted to. One good push from her and I’d be flying out the window or rolling down the stairs … ;)

One day, she visited me after school. It must have been the day report cards were handed out, because she was carrying it along with her. As we talked, she laid it on one of the desks, so I went over and glanced at it.

I’ve told my students many times, especially during those instances where I hear whispering behind my back or notes being “secretly” passed, that I didn’t want to become a teacher because I loved children … I did it because I’m nosey and have to be up in everyone’s business all the time.

The kids laughed at this. They thought I was joking.

“Look, Francesca,” I said, pointing to at her grades. “You should be really proud of yourself. Your science grade has gone up from an F last quarter, to a D this one.”

She just smirked at me and shrugged, seemingly at a loss for words (something that rarely ever happens during class as I am trying to teach a lesson).

“Maybe next quarter you can raise it even farther and bring it up to a C …” I pressed on.

“That would be fine,” she said.

“And look at this: Your effort and conduct have both gone up from unacceptable to needs improvement.”

Francesca looked at me very seriously. “You can raise my effort if you have to, but keep my conduct right where it is … I don’t want the other kids to think that I care about school or something.”

I just looked at her for a moment. “What does it matter if the other kids see that you’ve gotten a satisfactory in conduct? It’s good to care about your education. Don’t you want to get the most out of it? I mean, if you have to be at school, you might as well try your best.”

“I have a reputation to uphold,” she replied. “I don’t care if you give me all A’s, just keep the unacceptables.”

After our conversation ended, she left my room for the afternoon and went on her way. She probably didn’t give a second thought about what she had said. She was honest. It was the truth. How many other students were just like her? How many other students acted up or didn’t try because that’s what they wanted their classmates to see?

It amazes me how powerful peer pressure truly is on this age group. I don’t remember having these issues when I was in school. I didn’t care if people thought me to be a dork or a nerd … It was who I was and I was comfortable with that. Even if Francesca does care, it saddens me that it might be at her own expense. If she continues on this path of “unacceptable” conduct, she might hold herself back when she could be getting ahead. The Cleveland neighborhood that she lives in isn’t ripe with possibilities, and, to get out, a person really has to rise above all the negative influences that surround them.

Hopefully something will snap Francesca out of her current way of thinking.

Hopefully she’ll see that she can do so much better, that she deserves so much better …

Middle School Lessons (#4)

In honor of my eighth graders' graduation tomorrow, I want to present another "Middle School Lesson" that solely revolves around them and their (shall we say) interesting way of thinking ...

Lesson #4: Being single is sad

On many occasions, either before or after class, the topic of dating would come up with my eighth graders.

Who is dating whom? Who hasn’t dated at all? Who is “lame” for not having a boyfriend?

I was never very surprised, but I still wanted to rip my hair out!

“You’re too young to be dating,” I’d say. “Be a kid. Have fun and hang out with your friends. You don’t need to worry about dating yet!”

Then, as if to catch me and block me in some corner, I would inevitably get the following question: “Okay … Then how old were you when you started dating?”

Wonderful! They practically played into my hands without even knowing it!

“I was seventeen,” I’d say.

And this isn’t a lie. I was the type of girl that didn’t want a boyfriend. I was the type of girl that enjoyed playing sports, acting in drama club, and hanging out with her friends. Now, don’t get me wrong. I crushed on just about every young actor and/or singer that was out there: Chris O’Donnell, Leonardo DiCaprio, Ryan Phillippe, Justin Timberlake … I had (have, I should admit) a long withstanding crush on Matt Dillon too, but that’s for another day. So, yes, while I liked boys (men!?), I just didn’t want them to complicate my life.

Sometimes the questioning would continue. “Well then … How many boyfriends have you had?”

I’d smile again. They probably don’t expect what’s coming next: “One … And I married him.”

Again, this is completely true. I’ve only had one boyfriend. I won’t pretend to be completely lily white, because I did have many male friends throughout my life, but I never got around to dating any of them. I didn’t have the whole “friends with benefits” nonsense either. A friend was a friend in my book.

But, what is so wrong with that?

Some people may look at me and think I’m too young to be married or that I haven’t experienced enough to have made that decision in the first place. To them, I’d say that I don’t need to sleep around with multiple guys to know when I’ve got a good thing (and I’m not talking about sex, I’m talking about much more than that). While society and the “celebrity culture” that we see on TV and in magazines may indicate otherwise, it is possible to go against that grain. I’m a complete nonconformist when it comes to popular culture and to “the crowd.” So, in that sense, I am very unique. I stick to my beliefs and ideas with a ferocity that many lose over time. I don’t care who is doing what … If I don’t want to do it, I won’t. Underage drinking, drugs, casual sex … You name it. I’m a walking public service announcement.

I only hope that some of this spirit will be passed to my own, biological children … If not to some of those "children" in my classroom. Lord knows, with the things they face each and every day, they could use it!

I wish each and every one of them the best.

Good luck eighth grade class of 2008! I will always remember you and think back fondly of our time (and many candid conversations) together! :)

Middle School Lessons (#3)

Lesson #3: Parents are creative

We've been talking about abstinence in sixth grade Health, recently. While I was circulating around the room during a lab period (and the students were actually working quite diligently), I overheard a conversation between one of my 6th graders, Nate, and his best friend Danny.

“My mom told me and my brother that she’ll pay each of us one hundred dollars each if we don’t get a girl pregnant by the time we finish high school.”

I hope he gets the money …

Middle School Lessons (#2)

Lesson #2: Eighth graders are perceptive

Today, I had the pleasure of viewing the second half of "The Miracle of Life" with my eighth graders. They were such good sports, putting up with the cheesy music and fuzzy photography all the way through ... and not laughing at the many images of sperm swimming in misdirected circles. They are a rare group (the highlight of my day) for which I am eternally thankful.

With about two minutes of video to go, the camera focuses in on a mother giving birth and eventually pans down to show a big, hairy head crowning in all its glory. Mere seconds later the baby's head is fully out, the blood and liquids are flowing, and the doctors are declaring: "It's a boy!"

To this, my eighth graders had many responses ... Shrieks, gasps, wide eyes and lots of "Ewwww's." But my favorite was from one of the four boys in the class.

"No. Just no," he sighed sadly, putting his head down on his desk.

I smiled to myself, shaking my head. It had only been about two minutes of footage. These kids probably see more blood and gore on a movie screen every other weekend.

As I went to the VCR to rewind the tape, one of the girls looked to me and said: "I didn't realize we were watching a video that promoted abstinence."

Ha! Neither did I!

Middle School Lessons (#1)

Today was my first day back at school after a much needed Easter/spring break. In honor of that, I wanted to post my first of (hopefully) many "Middle School Lessons" posts. It is amazing what happens at my school, and I just don't feel right keeping it all to myself.

So, without further delay ...

Lesson #1: Farts are funny

It was the end of the day and we were supposed to be getting ready to go home, when *Nathan, one of my 6th graders approached me very seriously. He does this a lot, so I knew he had a question burning in his mind that he was afraid to ask in front of the other students.

“Yes, Nate? What do you want to know?” I preempted.

He paused, looked from my face to that of one of his friends, and then just let it fly: “Mrs. Emily, do you fart?”

I did my best to suppress a smile (I don’t like them to know just how amusing they are sometimes) and I shrugged my shoulders. Technically, this was a science question ... Right up my alley!

“Sure, Nate,” I responded. “Everyone does … Although I don’t do that sort of thing here.”

Nate fell to the ground (literally) and rolled around in fits of laughter. Those students standing nearby looked to him, then me, in utter confusion.

If only they knew … But, then again, news travels fast in the 6th grade.

*Names have been (and will be) changed since these kids surf the internet like it’s nobody’s business and are bound to find me sooner or later! ;)