Middle School Lessons (#2)

Lesson #2: Eighth graders are perceptive

Today, I had the pleasure of viewing the second half of "The Miracle of Life" with my eighth graders. They were such good sports, putting up with the cheesy music and fuzzy photography all the way through ... and not laughing at the many images of sperm swimming in misdirected circles. They are a rare group (the highlight of my day) for which I am eternally thankful.

With about two minutes of video to go, the camera focuses in on a mother giving birth and eventually pans down to show a big, hairy head crowning in all its glory. Mere seconds later the baby's head is fully out, the blood and liquids are flowing, and the doctors are declaring: "It's a boy!"

To this, my eighth graders had many responses ... Shrieks, gasps, wide eyes and lots of "Ewwww's." But my favorite was from one of the four boys in the class.

"No. Just no," he sighed sadly, putting his head down on his desk.

I smiled to myself, shaking my head. It had only been about two minutes of footage. These kids probably see more blood and gore on a movie screen every other weekend.

As I went to the VCR to rewind the tape, one of the girls looked to me and said: "I didn't realize we were watching a video that promoted abstinence."

Ha! Neither did I!

Poems

It's been a while and, to appease my single reader, I wanted to post something fun.

I had my 6th graders writing poems for a reading assignment (being in a Catholic school means a "science teacher" must teach more than just science) and one of my kids, Sam, wrote a poem about me:

My Teacher
Crazy as can be.
Screaming,
Yelling,
Giving demrits [sic], detention, or
Right [sic] your name on a paper
So watch
OUT
KIDS

The deadly Mrs. Emily
May attack.
P.S. She scares children

Now, I thought I've been a very kind, patient, and enthusiastic teacher over these past nine months. Certainly not someone who "scares children" and is "crazy as can be." So, I spoke to Sam and wondered if maybe he could find it in his heart to write a nicer poem ... One that was a little more flattering:

Mrs. Emily
Funny,
Helpful,
Scientific and sometimes crazy :)
Happy
when she see a smile

I'd have to say the second one is better all around.

And more accurate, too!

Rejection

I interviewed at a local career center for a biotechnology instructor position (which would have, I think, been the perfect blend of science and teaching) at the end of last month. I feel that I did pretty well. I was smiley and enthusiastic, didn't fall into the "limp handshake" trap, maintained good, yet not creepy, eye contact, highlighted all the relevant biotech experience (three years of stem cell research) that I have had, and basically tried to be more likable and bubbly than I think I truly am. It went positively ... At least from what I could gather... But I still ended up feeling like a big cheeseball when it was all over. I mean, I was technically myself in that conference room, but I don't particularly enjoy spending an entire hour just rambling on an on about what I can do and/or would do in various situations to four complete strangers.

Even though I came out of it feeling confident, I still felt that the decision to recommend me to the Superintendent of the school district could go either way. Either they'd like my attitude and previous lab experience, have faith in me and my abilities, and take a chance on the fact that I haven't been teaching very long (at middle school, instead of high school, level) ... Or they'd pass.

Turns out, they decided to pass.

Now, I hate being rejected as much as the next person. It's not a fun feeling, even if you do get to hear the news privately, over a recorded message, instead of at a face-to-face meeting with your interviewer. Quite obviously, and quite simply, it sucks. I really (truly) felt that that job would have been perfect for me and my abilities thus far ... Yet, somehow, I'm very much okay with the news at the same time.

I guess I've always been of the mindset that "everything happens for a reason" (whether this is attributed to my Catholic upbringing, or just a mantra that I have adopted over time, is something to grapple with some other day). Maybe, by not getting this job, something better will come along and I will be happy that I didn't get it. Only time will tell, but, for now, I'm hopeful that there's more to this story that I am unaware of at this point. I mean, my current teaching position caused me so much grief that I made myself physically sick and nearly quit after the second week of school ... But I stuck it out, I'm just about finished with the year, and I do believe that I'm still there for some strange and wonderful reason. Who, knows? Maybe one student will find the cure for cancer because I interested him/her in science and dedicate his/her Nobel Prize to me.

It would be nice.

So, yeah, rejection sucks and I'm not too excited to spread this news to all of those individuals that have been pulling for me, but I'm okay with it ... And if you see any awesome high school science positions in the Northeast Ohio area, please let me know.

Middle School Lessons (#1)

Today was my first day back at school after a much needed Easter/spring break. In honor of that, I wanted to post my first of (hopefully) many "Middle School Lessons" posts. It is amazing what happens at my school, and I just don't feel right keeping it all to myself.

So, without further delay ...

Lesson #1: Farts are funny

It was the end of the day and we were supposed to be getting ready to go home, when *Nathan, one of my 6th graders approached me very seriously. He does this a lot, so I knew he had a question burning in his mind that he was afraid to ask in front of the other students.

“Yes, Nate? What do you want to know?” I preempted.

He paused, looked from my face to that of one of his friends, and then just let it fly: “Mrs. Emily, do you fart?”

I did my best to suppress a smile (I don’t like them to know just how amusing they are sometimes) and I shrugged my shoulders. Technically, this was a science question ... Right up my alley!

“Sure, Nate,” I responded. “Everyone does … Although I don’t do that sort of thing here.”

Nate fell to the ground (literally) and rolled around in fits of laughter. Those students standing nearby looked to him, then me, in utter confusion.

If only they knew … But, then again, news travels fast in the 6th grade.

*Names have been (and will be) changed since these kids surf the internet like it’s nobody’s business and are bound to find me sooner or later! ;)