Lemonade

This weekend, I found out that my sister-in-law is pregnant with her first child.

At first, this news made me incredibly frustrated, angry, and annoyed because I wanted to be the one to bring the first grandchild to our side of the family. It would only be fair ... I was married before her, after all.

Then, after thinking about it (or rather, stewing over it for a couple of days), I've decided that I'm okay and that I can totally deal with it.

(I just realized how silly that sounds ... How big of me! Ha!)

Not only will my sister-in-law make many mistakes for me (from which I may learn and look all the smarter), but she will also act as a buffer in what I like to call "The New Grand-Mother Factor," or just "NGMF" for short. Science nerd that I am, I have actually documented and researched this factor with other new mothers in my family.

During the height of the NGMF, the new grandmother takes her role to the extreme:

• She fusses over the baby way more than is physically necessary
• She questions everything. (For example: "He looks hot! Why is he wearing a T-shirt and a Onesie??)
• She makes unexpected "pop-in" appearances during all hours of the day
• She purchases the baby ridiculously ugly or unnecessary gifts (For example: A velveteen Santa suit for Christmas or a Christian CD that inserts new grandchild's name into the songs)

No, NGMF is not pretty and is much more detrimental and scarring (to both mother and child) than plain old GMF. So, by being second to procreate (whether planned or unplanned as the case may be), I could essentially be decreasing my chances of having NGMF influence my day-to-day postpartum life.

But all that aside, I think I finally (deep down) realize that any baby is a blessing. It doesn't matter if it is the first, second, third, or thirteenth grandchild. It is a grandchild, plain and simple, and that is all that matters. It will be loved and spoiled and enjoyed regardless of its birth order.

Maybe I can "one up" her with a set of twins or something. ;)