Middle School Lessons (#5)

Since I can't think of anything else in my own life worth posting about, I've decided to take a look at my notes from last school year and come up with another lesson ... Not only does this give me something to tide over my handful (Is that an exaggeration?) of readers, it reminds me just why I'm still searching for that new teaching position and not giving up.

Lesson #5: Appearance is everything

It’s really very interesting how one child’s demeanor and/or behavior can be one way in class and a completely different way after class.

For instance, one of my 7th graders was a tough, street-smart girl named Francesca. In class she was loud, rude, disrespectful, and lazy … But, at the end of the day she was probably the sweetest, funniest girl you could ever want to meet. It’s a good thing she liked me (or, maybe, at the very least tolerated me) because she could totally snap me in half like a twig if she wanted to. One good push from her and I’d be flying out the window or rolling down the stairs … ;)

One day, she visited me after school. It must have been the day report cards were handed out, because she was carrying it along with her. As we talked, she laid it on one of the desks, so I went over and glanced at it.

I’ve told my students many times, especially during those instances where I hear whispering behind my back or notes being “secretly” passed, that I didn’t want to become a teacher because I loved children … I did it because I’m nosey and have to be up in everyone’s business all the time.

The kids laughed at this. They thought I was joking.

“Look, Francesca,” I said, pointing to at her grades. “You should be really proud of yourself. Your science grade has gone up from an F last quarter, to a D this one.”

She just smirked at me and shrugged, seemingly at a loss for words (something that rarely ever happens during class as I am trying to teach a lesson).

“Maybe next quarter you can raise it even farther and bring it up to a C …” I pressed on.

“That would be fine,” she said.

“And look at this: Your effort and conduct have both gone up from unacceptable to needs improvement.”

Francesca looked at me very seriously. “You can raise my effort if you have to, but keep my conduct right where it is … I don’t want the other kids to think that I care about school or something.”

I just looked at her for a moment. “What does it matter if the other kids see that you’ve gotten a satisfactory in conduct? It’s good to care about your education. Don’t you want to get the most out of it? I mean, if you have to be at school, you might as well try your best.”

“I have a reputation to uphold,” she replied. “I don’t care if you give me all A’s, just keep the unacceptables.”

After our conversation ended, she left my room for the afternoon and went on her way. She probably didn’t give a second thought about what she had said. She was honest. It was the truth. How many other students were just like her? How many other students acted up or didn’t try because that’s what they wanted their classmates to see?

It amazes me how powerful peer pressure truly is on this age group. I don’t remember having these issues when I was in school. I didn’t care if people thought me to be a dork or a nerd … It was who I was and I was comfortable with that. Even if Francesca does care, it saddens me that it might be at her own expense. If she continues on this path of “unacceptable” conduct, she might hold herself back when she could be getting ahead. The Cleveland neighborhood that she lives in isn’t ripe with possibilities, and, to get out, a person really has to rise above all the negative influences that surround them.

Hopefully something will snap Francesca out of her current way of thinking.

Hopefully she’ll see that she can do so much better, that she deserves so much better …